Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Happy Wednesday (Frustration) (04/25/2012)

Hey Guys, Been a while! I think the lesson I've been learning the past few weeks has been on learning to deal with frustrations. Granted, quite often frustrations come from legitimate sources, where our antagonists are purposefully unfair and spiteful; or perhaps it really IS just one of those days where the laws of probability and physics seem to conspire against you. However, what I've been learning has more to do with why perfectly normal, decent, well meaning human beings can frustrate each other. What I've found helpful in the past is that it often helps to step away from the person/problem, and soberly ask yourself whether you are the one in error (even if only partially). In my case, the answer is quite often a disheartening "yes." If so, it falls on us to humbly acknowledge this fault and to apologize. Sounds so easy but pride ensures this to be a gut wrenchingly difficult task at times. Even were it not your fault, taking the time to calm yourselves and approach the other person with humility is far more likely to obtain a positive response rather than a defensive one. I think in arguments, defense is generally the worst way to go. Talk with the person rather than avoid the issue. This is important because we often make the false assumption that we understand the other person's point of view. So often, arguments flare up over a simple misunderstanding of a person's words or intentions or a difference in expectations. Although a solution or compromise isn't always possible, understanding each other's views is the first step towards peace. Timing is important too. You do not want to talk about it too soon, while the anger is still fresh. Yet you do not want to put it off too long to where the other person (or you) no longer cares about the matter. This is not peace or reconciliation, this is apathy and in some ways it is even worse than actual fighting. Apathy is effectively saying to yourself that this person is not important enough for me to resolve problems with. You miss out on learning important things about yourself and the other person by abstaining from difficult conversations. So much about myself was learnt by striving to be honest and humble while refusing to ignore awkward conversations with people closest to me. Encouragement for the week. May we not avoid difficult conversations; may we deal with our frustrations with each other in ways that are humble and genuine; and may we find ourselves not only able, but willing to talk and pray about things that bothers us. Have a happy Wednesday Edward "Blessed are the peace makers, for they will be called sons of God." Matthew 5:9 "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." Ephesians 4:2-3 "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32 Dare to fight? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5MDV2rj33I